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[Feb. 28th, 2004|10:12 pm] |
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If I was an elephant I think a good career would be something in data managing. Sure my dad might want me to go into the family buisness and work for the circus or something but isn't it about time we broke down these debilitating stereotypes? |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 28th, 2004|11:06 am] |
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Sharks sure are dangerous. But they are even more dangerous once they've got a few drinks in them and you insult their mother. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 28th, 2004|11:03 am] |
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I stepped out onto my balcony. I glanced over the edge. It was a 70 foot drop and the fall would surely kill me. "Good thing I'm not thinking of jumping", I said to myself. Then I went back inside and watched some TV or something. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 20th, 2004|12:24 am] |
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A fun thing to do is hot glue gun mice to your shoes and then let them carry you around on their backs, like your own personal shoe chariots. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 20th, 2004|12:18 am] |
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The truth hurts. Especially when you are morbidly obese with fried hair and bad teeth and pimply skin with a beefy patty of fatness under your chin and then you ask for someones opinion on how you look. Plus, that sweater doesn't look good on you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 26th, 2004|08:58 pm] |
Roland looked up at me with his deep blue eyes. The twinkle was gone. The months of disease and hospital beds had worn him out. He took my hand and placed an unmarked envelope into it. He pulled me in closer and whispered into my ear.
"I need you to listen to me very carefully. I need you to do me a favour, it is of the utmost importance that this envelope..." I didn't really catch the rest of what he said. Sometimes people can be so self-centered you just gotta tune them out. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 26th, 2004|08:43 pm] |
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I think every now and then it's a nice gesture to show the people around you how you really feel about them. For example, buy those you love flowers and a box of chocolates! For those you admire, write them a secret admirer note! So mysterious! And for those you hate, kidnap their only child and demand they wire 100 grand into your Swiss account or little Janie gets it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 17th, 2004|11:01 pm] |
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I caressed her soft hand and gazed into her eyes. A small grin emerged on my face as I came to the realization that I was in love. The moment was perfect. The autumn sunset reflected off her golden hair. The colourful leaves dropped from their branches. The air was crisp filled with the scent of a new beginning, and a certain muskiness. Likely the embalming fluid. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 17th, 2004|11:00 pm] |
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I think a hamster makes a good pet, epescially when it's called a dog and listens to what the fuck your saying rather than running on it's wheel like a retard. |
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